Yes Jay was known by many other nicknames by his different extended families in which he created, but that was Jay. He liked to be different and just wanted to be loved. Nothing more nothing less. He did EVERYTHING he could to protect himself... But that was NOT in a selfish way..... It was PURELY I'M ORDER TO BE HERE AND STRONG ENOUGH TO PROTECT, CARE FOR AND LOOK AFTER OTHERS. Although he was a very private man where it mattered, he was proud in many different ways. Yes stubborn as anything, but you always realised I'm the end, exactly why he was so stubborn as the reasons would be clear afterwards. I hate to admit it, but he was pretty much always right and he knew it. EXCEPT for now.... That there is life after death and in his words "Oh boy is this fun"!! He loved the thought of becoming immortal and this included his online presence which should hopefully last forever. His TV and radio appearances, his shows, charitable events, the FlyBoarding experiences, his concerts he performed in with his guitar, his UFO sounds and Sounds Grooovy Roadshows he did as a DJ, just everything he did was in aid of pleasing others and the most importantly, putting a smile on everyones face. Even when doing his displays, he was really strong about making sure he involved as many people as possible. So interacting with the crowds was a must. He wanted them to feel special and like they were part of the show anfd part of his life in that moment so they could feel the pride that he could feel and be happy and uplifted. Everyone he respected and respected him, he classed as family. Yes he had his immediate family that he had made for himself and through me, but he also had 100s of other families nationally. I wish he had realised just how much he was loved when he was here as he found that hard to believe sometimes. I live you Jay and always have since the day we met. I know we didn't get together straight away, but I'm so glad I took that risk as I was able to be the one that looked after you and helped you retain your dignity and self-respect 24/7 to the end. I know you are still here in sprit sweetheart and I'm glad you can now see that I am exactly who you fell in love with and have always put you first despite how it looked or was portrayed at the time. Everything I've done has been for you and please do not ever worry about not taking me out /away enough as you said in your letter.... Never apologise for that as we did still go places with JSRA, FlyBoarding, shows etc and that was better than anything I could ask or wish for as I got to see you doing what you love..... "ENTERTAINING CROWDS AND LEAVING A LASTING MEMORY FOR THOSE YOU MADE SMILE" (including me and my pride for you). I love you so much sweetheart Thank you for letting me be your friend, girlfriend, carer, Jack of all, lol.... And finally... Fiancée. I promise your legacy will live on in history. Night night Jay my sweetheart. I love you Love Amy